Letter From The Workers And Peasants Of The Berlusconi Youth To Comrade Ambassador Liu Xiaoming

FROM: The Workers & Peasants of the Berlusconi Youth
TO: political@chinese-embassy.org.uk
CC: rp.zhang@chinese-embassy.org.uk
SUBJECT: Contradictions!

Dear Comrade Ambassador Liu,

Allow me to extend the communist felicitations of the workers and peasants of the Berlusconi Youth.

It is with a heavy heart that I must contact you on a matter of some urgency and crisis.

Let me put this to you, Comrade Ambassador, in a way not to offend or unnerve.

It has come to our attention that there is a rumour going around that the complex empirical realities of 21st century Chinese economy and society may be in contradiction with key tenets of 18th and 19th Century German Idealism.

I can assure you, Comrade Ambassador, that I am as shocked as you to hear such a thing.

The situation is, apparently, that a subjective class consciousness does not exist on the part of the Chinese proletariat, and yet the Chinese proletariat – as a politically and economically dis-empowered strata – is an empirical fact; notwithstanding the many fine Communist entrepreneurs, both millionaires and billionaires, who staff the Peoples’ Congress and live selfless lives devoted to the building of True Communism in accordance with the program laid down by Comrade-Event called Lenin/Stalin.

The quandary, Comrade Ambassador, is the following: given the above situation, can it be said that class “exists” in China, in a “proper” sense? That is, of course, in accordance with the inviolable principles of 18th and 19th Century German Idealism.

I am “CCing” this email to your colleague in the maritime desk, Comrade Zhang, who I have it on good authority will be capable of contributing productively to what I trust will be the swift and decisive resolution of this matter.

Yours in Deng Xiaoping Theory,

The Workers & Peasants of the Berlusconi Youth


3 responses

  1. Tyrone Slothrop

    I play Umbrella to Amelia on my ukulele, but she doesn’t sing along like she almost always does for Wagon Wheel.

    March 28, 2012 at 9:12 am

    • $ell out* Against Me! singer Tom Gabel does a nice version, too.

      It was on a punk comp CD aiding some child abuse charity and there was a review in one of the pious punk zines that don’t like to touch anything with a barcode on it and the dude was complaining because the charity supports sex offender registries and he was once arrested for public urination, and ended up on the list. I don’t know why that’s relevant but *I thought Agaisnt Me! were selloutz! even before they signed to Warner.

      March 28, 2012 at 12:17 pm

    • You should also raise that kid multicultural-like.

      March 28, 2012 at 12:21 pm

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